July 15, 2003
FSM 377CM/FM9/01
Special Action FSM #11
Copyright 2001 by The Family
Tips on Bible Studies and Small Groups4
—Tips for You, the Group Leader6
—Making It Personal7
—Basic Types of Small Groups9
—In a Nutshell12
—A Possible Agenda13
—Stages of Growth15
—How to Build a Family Atmosphere16
Breaking the Ice17
—Sample Icebreakers20
Mobilizing for Outreach25
—How to Multiply Your Group and Your Efforts25
—Plan to Make Plans26
—Harvest Events and Invitation Quotas26
Tap into the Power!—A 12-Week Course29
By WS
Dear Family,
God bless you! The following articles were put together by Tommy (of Sao Paulo, Brazil), from the experience of his Home and others in Brazil in building a fruitful follow-up work. Although their field and their sheep may be very different from yours, you will probably find much in the following tips, explanations, and advice that will be a help in your Activated follow-up ministry.
In Tommy’s follow-up, he has used small group meetings for filling people’s personal needs for friendship, fellowship, relaxation, help with personal problems—as well as their need for the Word. Many of those attending (though not all) are over 40, and have had a hard day of work when they come to the meeting. So the Lord has led him to make the get-togethers lots of fun, inviting, and warm. The method Tommy is presenting here uses small group meetings not solely as a Bible study, but to also provide needed support for life’s challenges, prayer for problems, fellowship, and an atmosphere geared to drawing people into the Family. Those attending these meetings usually also attend the weekly area-wide Church of Love, where there is a Word study; the same Word theme is then often discussed, applied, and studied further in the small group.
These methods may work for you, but you will probably need to prayerfully adapt them to the culture and the needs of the people you are reaching. In the Activated Training Course (ATC), there will be varied approaches and material for you to use and adapt as needed to your situation. Classes from the ATC are being made available on the Members Only Web site as they are completed. The first two parts of the ATC—four Introductory classes, and the 12 Foundation Stones consisting of 24 classes—are already posted. When complete, the entire course will be printed for your use along with many other supplementary materials and aids. A more advanced discipleship course will then follow.
As many of you are beginning to have friends over, or those you have been inviting over are beginning to need and want more responsibility, we pray these tips from Tommy provide ideas and counsel on leading small groups or teaching your friends to do so. Please take these ideas to the Lord and ask Him how you can adapt them to your situation.
We pray this is a blessing to you as you follow Jesus’ commandment to make disciples of all nations!
Love, WS
By Peter
Many of our live-outs have expressed the desire for a new name, as the term live-outs implies that they are outside of the circle of the Family. The truth is that live-outs are very much a part of our Family, and are serious disciples in spirit, as many of you can testify. We don’t want to push them out; rather we want to bring them in and include them as they deserve to be included!
As was explained in The Family’s Future and Expansion Program (GN 908), the Lord is leading the Family in the direction of welcoming the sheep into our folds—not only disciples who forsake all and live communally, but disciples who are not able to join the Family and live with us full time. About this, He said:
I intend to bring new disciples to you—those who want to serve Me in whatever capacity they can. Most of these new disciples will not drop out and serve Me full time, but they will be disciples nonetheless. They will be members of the Family. They will be coworkers and co-laborers with you. They will help open doors that you could never enter. They will be believers, followers, disciples, helpers, and supporters. They will be your flock; they will be your brothers and sisters, and together all of you will be part of My new expanded Family. I’m going to open the doors wide so that many more can join your ranks at the level of belief and discipleship they can attain.
I will expand your ranks to include various levels of discipleship and believership. Rather than closing them off, I now want to open the circle and let them in. I wish for those who want to be part of you, in faith, to be able to be so. I will make a way for those who want to believe and receive, but who don’t feel they can do a great deal, to nevertheless be a part of My Family. I will make a way for those who wish to be disciples to be so, even if they can’t leave all and follow Me (GN 908:28-30).
In light of the direction the Lord has given above, we are praying and working on redefining the levels of Family membership and discipleship. There will most likely be new terminology for the new levels of Family membership that will be created, as well as a new name for the live-outs, and we’ll present these new terms to you as soon as they are established.
In the meantime, however, we’d like to discontinue the use of the term live-outs. Instead, those formerly known as live-outs will, for the time being, be called Active members. We may change this name as we pray more about the levels of Family membership, but for now we’ll use this terminology in our pubs, and you could do the same. Our wonderful Active members are part of our Family. They are active witnessers and are winning the world alongside us. God bless them!
(QUOTES TO PUT THROUGHOUT MAG):
To raise up a new generation of leaders to help in the coming harvest is absolutely vital, just as Dad said in the early Letters that our major ministry is quietly and privately training leaders (ML #70:4).
Our twofold objective: Win new members and also train new leaders who can in turn win more disciples.
If you want to see new people mature into discipleship, you need to create places and situations where this process can take hold, spots where leaders-in-training can take responsibility.
The more capable leaders there are, the more quality groups you can open and the more new people can participate. Each new group represents a place where more disciples can mature.
The principle of 2 Timothy 2:2—raising up leaders who can reproduce by training other leaders—is making a comeback!
The key is not just to win new disciples, but to train other disciple-makers.
Prepare for every meeting in prayer and involve your bellwethers. Keep the meeting on track and well balanced—including fellowship, praise, Word, and prayer.
Try to integrate small groups into the bigger Family through citywide activities such as Church of Love, retreats, or parties.
Witness to those outside the group by building bridges of friendship through fun events, which are the net to draw them in.
Love never fails! If your group is marked by contagious love, then people will want to join it, and more and better disciples will be made.
By Tommy, Brazil
Have you tried starting a small Bible study group and it never took off? Have you wondered why your follow-up is not producing the fruit you expected? Are you looking to make your small Bible study groups more effective? We have found that there are no black and white safe formulas, but that there are some principles that promote the growth of friends and Active members (live-outs).
1. Gather the harvest in like-minded groups (affinity groups). New people are much more likely to feel at ease in a small group with people who have similar backgrounds and interests. This could mean couples of about the same age with children of the same age. This could mean a women’s group. This could mean a young people’s group. This could mean one group of people from a higher-income bracket and another one with people from a lower-income bracket, particularly if one’s social level is important in the culture where you are.
In the beginning, when people are still very hung up on appearances and their own personal needs, it is a good idea to try to accommodate them where they are at. We have seen people change deeply as time passes; their tendencies to discriminate against other social classes or age groups diminish as they grow spiritually, and eventually they get the victory over these social barriers. As they start to put the Lord first in their life and attend our Church of Love (which we hold here in São Paulo weekly for all the various groups), they slowly let themselves blend together.
But it’s got to be a work of the Spirit! We would advise not forcing them to cross these social barriers in the beginning, unless the Lord specifically shows you to do so. At the same time, it is good to slowly nudge them into losing these worldly tendencies and class consciousness that can separate people from each other.
2. Express your dependence on the Lord through regular prayer together. Only the Lord can help you to grow, and in groups that are growing, prayer must not be only talked about, it must be practiced! We have sometimes held half-hour prayer sessions, praying for the needs of the sheep and for friends and relatives that our Active members are ministering to. This shows that when the Lord adds to the church, it is a work of His Spirit. We have witnessed the power of prayer, and this encourages our flock that true growth is prayer-based. Trying to grow without the power of the Lord’s Spirit through prayer is like trying to buy a car without a motor.
3. Make it clear that the motive for a new group getting together is to fulfill the Great Commission—not just to have a social get-together or even a self-help Bible study. The group must have goals that reach outward, not just inward. Some may feel that they join a group to get fed and cared for, and while this is true, if that is the only goal the new person can easily become a Christian couch potato. But if they get the vision from the start to witness proactively to their friends and relatives, the group stays alive and vibrant. Over the long haul, small groups of Active members work if they have this orientation, and if the group is considered a means of reaching a neighborhood or city.
4. In relation to this, make multiplication the goal of each new group. Fruitful witnessing naturally results in the group growing and then multiplying. Fun and fellowship is always present, but it is more of a by-product than a goal. Stagnant, non-growing groups simply can’t be tolerated forever. Group leaders must be clear that, as Dad said in For God’s Sake, Follow God, The name of the game is multiplication (ML #4:112).
There is always a danger that Bible groups will become cozy clubs for the initiated, but this atmosphere must be avoided at all costs. The vision is for all Christians to fulfill the Great Commission, which is to witness, make disciples, and multiply! Since we have embraced this principle in our work here in Brazil, things have grown much faster and our sheep are much more inspired! Witnessing, adding to your flock, and then becoming two groups instead of one is simply a way of life, not just a one-time push!
5. Go for quality, not necessarily quantity. Groups reproduce more easily when quality is maintained. This means that all the groups in a certain area need to keep a similar vision and standard.
For example, all groups should meet regularly for the purpose of spiritual growth and personal outreach, and should be committed to participating in the functions of the local work (CTP projects, Church of Love, etc.). By quality we also mean that the groups must develop an intimacy with the Lord, an intimacy with the others in the group, and have a broken heart for the lost—all of which will lead to their being effective. Our groups have been multiplying again and again as long as the makeup is simple and pure. Then the vision of keeping the same quality is easily transferred from one group to its offspring.
6. Put emphasis on setting goals. Although this can seem to be a touchy point, everyone knows that Without a vision, the people perish (Prov.29:18), and If you shoot for the stars, at least you’ll hit the ceiling! There’s nothing more uniting and fun than a reachable goal for a team of people to fight for! There needn’t be too much of a competitive spirit or the negative comparing game if everyone just sticks to their own faith and rejoices in the victories of others. When a group has a goal, everything seems to go better and the people are definitely more motivated.
7. Place importance on a larger, area-wide Church of Love as well as on each small group. (Editor’s note: Some Homes may not have both, but in São Paulo there are a number of small groups meeting together during the week, then a large COL on Sunday which is a meeting place for all friends, Active members, and newcomers too. Please see more on the São Paulo COL on page 10 of this FSM.) Just as we need to air out and have a break from the same old ugly mugs we see every day in our Homes, our friends also need to see new faces and hear different kinds of testimonies at the weekly Church of Love. The combination of the constant possibility of bigger fellowships like parties and COLs as well as the intimacy you can only find in a small group keeps the inspiration level quite high!
Box:
Back to the basics! The time-tested arena for spiritual growth—from the Garden of Eden, to Jesus and His disciples, to the founding of the Family, to our present Endtime leadership training—has been in community, in a family.
People don’t want religion or a set of rules; they want relationships that are deep and meaningful both with God and with other people. They need love and friends. Loving relationships are the bait as well as the glue for effective groups.
The Great Commission is not only to obey Mark 16:15 and preach the Gospel, but also to make disciples of all nations (Matthew 28:18b-20). In a small group you can create a close, intimate circle of love that you bring others into, where you share the Word and principles of faith in a vibrant and dynamic and personal way, and in the process enlarge your outreach by multiplying disciple-makers, truly fruit that remains!
You don’t need to be a superstar or charismatic Bible whiz to lead a group! Just be yourself—and better yet, be like Himself—Jesus, that is! You don’t need to be a Bible knowledge freak, nor do you need to be an extrovert with all the latest jokes (though a good joke may come in handy)! But you do need to love the sheep! And feed them according to their capacity to receive.
Now that we’ve established what doesn’t make a difference in your ability to lead a successful, fruitful small group, here are some tips we found that really do make a difference:
1. Your personal time with the Lord. Those with successful, productive, fruitful, multiplying groups invest in their daily personal Word and prayer time. A survey of Christian pastors showed that leaders who spent 90 minutes or more every day in their quiet time bore enough fruit to multiply their groups twice as fast as those who invested less than 30 minutes daily.
2. Intercessory prayer for the group members. Those who pray daily for the sheep in their fold have a much greater probability of producing quality fruit, with more healthy sheep, reproducing more often.
3. Spiritual preparation for the weekly meeting. You being in spiritual shape and being prayed up for the meeting as the shepherd is actually more important than the preparation of the material you plan to study. You need to prepare yourself first, then prepare the lesson.
4. Setting goals. Peter shared the benefits of setting goals in Goals for 1998, and Dad confirmed this in a message in the same GN: We get our eyes on today, and we miss seeing the forest for the trees right in front of us. Goals are like the steps that get you from the bottom of the mountain to the top (ML #3160:20-21, Lifelines 24). We have seen that a group will grow a lot faster if everyone gets inspired about bearing fruit with the goal of multiplying their group in the not-too-distant future. They progress as they see that they really are a part of the Great Commission.
Although goals aren’t always the key to growth, we have found that failing to share with the group members the vision to grow increases the chances of stagnating and the group eventually hitting bottom, growing inward rather than outward. Everyone needs to get their eyes off of themselves and onto the Lord and the lost—getting them saved and then making them disciples.
It is even good to establish a reasonable deadline f or your group to grow to the point that they will need to multiply. Then everyone gets on board to pray for and reach the goal of world conquest through love. We have found that the groups will multiply if everyone is faithful to pray for and invite new sheep regularly.
One of the most concrete ways to set goals is through organizing harvest events or establishing invitation quotas. (See the article, Harvest Events and Invitation Quotas, on these methods on page 26 of this FSM.) Just make sure the goals are reachable and don’t cause everyone to get too competitive.
5. Regular shepherding (weekly personal time, if possible) and visitation. Meeting personally with your new sheep every month, rather than just counting on the weekly meeting to meet everyone’s needs, greatly increases the chances of your group growing in a healthy way and eventually multiplying. There’s nothing like the personal touch! Although it is a major investment of your time, it eventually pays off, as the sheep grow faster, learn to witness more effectively, and head up their own groups responsibly at a much quicker pace.
6. Pray diligently for the group members, as well as for not-yet-saved sheep. If you were to compare prayer, social contact, and events that you invite sheep to, you would find that prayer for the group members is the deciding factor in growth. Action through prayer—the underused spiritual weapon! We have seen intercessory prayer bring people through things that nothing else could! It’s tried and proven!
7. Impart training. Bellwethers and undershepherds who feel that they’ve been invested in through training are much more likely to stay on track, bearing fruit, and eventually multiplying their group than those who just kind of wing it without much training. This usually means having an Active member understudy share the responsibility and learn the ropes with you until the Lord raises them up to take over, under your supervision. On the other hand, we have seen that training is still not as important to success as one’s spiritual condition, prayer life, and clear goals.
Often a Bible study group can fade into oblivion and you don’t understand why. It started out with everyone inspired, but then things went dry, people didn’t show up, and many seemed bored in a Bible study that you considered quite inspiring. This is why the Lord led us to approach the Bible study part of the meeting as just one of the five essential elements of every meeting, not the whole thing!
In addition to Bible study, we found that people needed a bit of time to warm up to one another and to the Word. Most everyone attending our groups has probably had a hard day at work—so we discovered that opening a book and reading was often the last thing on his or her mind in this state! So we began to use icebreakers at the beginning of the meeting to create a kind of brief Happy Hour time, when we prime the pump for people to enter in, let down their walls, and get ready to get into the Spirit.
Singing a few praise songs after the icebreakers has also helped create a good atmosphere for Word time, which is the main part of the meeting.
But then again, even during our Word time, someone’s personal need may come up and discussion/prayer for that has at times taken priority. We found this was fine—we have just let it happen and prayed for the person. We’ve received prophecies for that person! We’ve helped the person through his or her crisis. The idea has been that the people themselves are the agenda, not the class! We have found that if we dedicate ourselves to serving the sheep according to their needs, regardless of our own program, the Lord has blessed it. People get healed of their problems, the word spreads about how good the group is, more people come to the next meeting eager to know how their friend or relative got healed, etc. The healing–whether it be spiritual or physical–might never have happened if we hadn’t pulled the car over to see how we could help that person who needed personal attention. And when you minister to someone as their need arises, you are also training the others in the group to do the same when their turn comes around!
What does it mean to shepherd a small group? It’s much more than reading a class and hearing the wonderful sound of your own voice. It is learning to be sensitive to the needs of those in the group. In so doing you can get them to open up about their lives, get freed from their past hurts or bitterness, and in turn learn how to take care of others.
For these reasons, we haven’t referred to our meetings as simply Bible studies, but rather as Activated groups, or, if the team is advanced enough in their commitment, Discipleship Groups. (Editor’s note: You can call these open groups whatever you feel will be most appropriate for your sheep, country, their culture and needs. Some ideas are Action Group, Fellowship Group, Fellowship Bible Study, Family Bible Study, Family Group—whatever you feel will help people to come and feel welcome and feel they will not only study the Word but get closer to the Lord, the Family, and you. However, you might want to save the term Activated Group for those who are actually going through the Activated Training Course.)
The idea is not to have them enroll in a Christian self-help program where you major on the concepts alone or the fellowship alone, but along with that, people learn to include others in their own lives, open up, and witness—with the eventual goal of multiplying the group. If you can get them to actually commit themselves to becoming their brother’s keeper, they will grow spiritually much more quickly. If along the road to spiritual growth, they learn not only about the benefits but also about the responsibilities of belonging to God’s Family, then your main objective in getting them together will more than likely be reached.
It seems to make things clearer and more motivating if they feel they are joining a family rather than coming solely to study the Bible. At this gathering they can see their new friends, plan cool projects together (witnessing events and social events or a mix of the two), as well as continue their climb up the mountain of spiritual growth.
This is not to say you shouldn’t use the term Bible study in the beginning, as this may be the only term they can relate to. Anything that smacks of group therapy can be scary to some. If people are shy or have had bad group experiences in the past, they may feel hesitant if they think they will have to open up to complete strangers right away.
You do need to hear from the Lord about how to proceed with every group you get together, but it helps to realize right from the beginning that your main role is not to be just a Bible teacher, but more importantly a shepherd of the sheep and a mender of wounds. (See Prayer for Love and Mercy, ML #75.)
BOX:
Is your small group (Activated group, Discipleship Group, Bible study, or whatever you want to call it) an open maternity ward ready for new spiritual babes?
Is yours a loving Home marked by unity, healthy family relationships, and people who listen and care?
Is it a launching pad for learning to use spiritual gifts?
Is there training and trust?
It is important to understand basic group dynamics, and to establish the purpose and vision right at the start for your open small group meeting (which we in Brazil call an Activated Group, but you can call whatever fits best for you), and for your more advanced Discipleship Group. It’s good to understand the difference between these two. The open group can be for anyone—newcomers or those whom you have known for a long time. It is generally for those who have not yet decided on the extent of their commitment, or who have a lower commitment when compared to a Discipleship Group (which is for those who are making a much greater commitment to serve the Lord as His disciple). It is good for you as the shepherd to check them out a bit before they join a Discipleship Group. You may even want to innovate and open an intermediate group, a type of pre-discipleship group, to filter those who still aren’t sure they want to take the discipleship plunge. (Editor’s note: Please see FSMs 362 and 363 for a more in-depth explanation of what a Discipleship Group is.)
Let’s consider the purposes of these basic types of small groups:
1. The open group: Let’s say your Home has three or four veteran friends whom you consider faithful and dedicated. They are tithing or helping quite a bit in some substantial way, love the Lord, the Word, and witness to their friends and loved ones. Now with the Activated vision, you feel called to activate them a bit more. You feel the need to inspire them to become your bellwethers and help you launch your Home’s first open group. You inspire them to invite their friends and you invite sheep you’ve met over the last few months, and there you have it—your first open Activated group!
This then, is an open group of, say, four to twelve people (some new, some not) who may be at totally different levels of spiritual growth. Some you’ve known for a long time and are basically committed, and others are new sheep you’ve just recently met. Some may have never really read the Bible, so opening it up to read will be new to them. Some will never have sung a song to the Lord, so having inspiration is also new to them. Asking for prayer at the end of the meeting may also be a new concept to them. They may have the habit of praying by themselves when they wake up in the morning or before they go to bed at night, but never out loud and amidst a group of people they don’t yet feel comfortable with. They also are probably not used to sitting with a group of people they don’t know very well and forming new friendships, opening their heart, etc., so this too will be totally new to them.
When you add up all that is new, you soon realize that your job is not so much that of a teacher, but more of a shepherd. Sweetly helping them establish a personal relationship with the Lord and the Word, and loving each one into the Kingdom is more important than your Bible knowledge.
In your open group, you might have a mix of veterans together with some of your newer friends who have little idea of spiritual matters.—And that will help things get started and get the ball rolling, as the veterans pull the newer ones along. Your immediate goal is to get together those you already have in your hand and present them with a clear and simple vision of what the Our Activated Future GN is all about and how they are the test tube babies of your Home!
This prototype group—which you can call by any name, but we’re using Activated Group in this article—is vital to the expansion of the local work. The fact that you have several different levels of growth all in one group can actually be quite stimulating! Your basic job with a brand-new group (which might consist of your meat contact, your neighbor, your oldest live-out and his wife) is to form a little family of believers, with the goal of making them into disciples.
In reality, you may form four or five groups over the next year and in time select a few from each group that are discipleship material. Thus you form a Discipleship Group, your all-star team made up of members from your various open groups of believers. Building a good core group of 12 disciples may be a process taking a bit of time, even up to two or three years. (See Mama’s counsel on this subject in Choosing Disciples in The Word Witnessing Revolution, FSM 63, found in the HomeARC.)
2. The Discipleship Group: The main purpose of a Discipleship Group is leadership training, as the idea is that many in this group may already be leading, or in the future will be leading, their own groups. They have made the commitment to serve the Lord and live a standard of discipleship. This group meeting definitely does include quality Word time (we often read something meaty, like a GN), but a major goal is to supply your disciples’ personal needs for shepherding. They are your under-shepherds, diamonds in the rough, and you can help them grow spiritually by sharing your own experiences, victories, and battles as well as helping them resolve problems or questions that arise from their groups. In some ways, it is more of a leadership huddle than a Word study. It is also the place for them to get prayer when needed.
Thus the Discipleship Group is actually a way to care for your other small group’s leaders. It is not a group that runs parallel to the open groups such as the Activated Groups, and thus competes with them as far as time commitments. Since every disciple is encouraged to be a group leader, as well as possibly to help pioneer other new groups, the disciple is usually committed to at least three meetings a week—his or her own open group, the Discipleship Group, and the Church of Love (if you have one).
Most disciples are also involved in an outreach or Home ministry (see page 25 for more on this), so the commitment of discipleship can be quite high! But these are in reality the main pillars of the work and your partners, so they really need your input, prayers, and support. This weekly small meeting is vital to the health of your overall work, and personal time must be dedicated to your growing disciples.
Regardless of the type of group, it is important for you as the group leader to share the vision right from the beginning that you expect the attendees to eventually grow into spiritual parents themselves, through their own witnessing and follow-up. Share that you expect them to help you in the leadership of future groups. As Dad said, a truly mature Christian is one who bears spiritual babies and learns to care for them responsibly, until they too are able to get up and walk by themselves and care for and train the next generation. It is important they understand this concept of family responsibilities right from the beginning, if possible.
BOX:
* Vary the format; don’t get in a rut.
* Delegate the different parts of the meeting. This leads the group forward.
* Have your host serve a good snack. Have everyone bring something.
* Flow naturally in and out of the sections of the meeting. In other words, don’t say, For our icebreaker tonight Just let it happen.—Discuss the topics without making official announcements that make the meeting feel stiff and formal.
* End the meeting on time.
* Relax and enjoy yourself. Be personal with people.
BOX:
We have a citywide Church of Love where the Active members and friends from various Homes meet in one place, usually on Sunday, for an inspirational get-together of reading and singing. Since there are usually over 50 people at the Church of Love, there really isn’t time for the heart-sharing and active shepherding that the small group meetings have, and often a whole family attends, including children.
There are basic differences between the Church of Love (which we hold every Sunday night from 6 pm to 8 pm) and the small group meetings (held all over the city in people’s homes, with four to 12 attending). The COL provides general strengthening of our dear battle-weary soldiers for the week ahead. It uses the weapons of...
* praise (45 minutes of planned and powerful inspiration),
* Word (45 minutes of a message, usually part of a six- to eight-week series on one theme, thus allowing the subject matter to really sink in), and
* unity (there is great power and inspiration in united fellowship).
The small group meetings held during the week in the evening are where spiritual growth takes place and friendship bonds are formed. People really get to know one another in these small groups. They can also invite sheep to their group who otherwise might not go to the more religious setting of the COL.
We have many sheep who much prefer their small group to the COL, as the intimacy and interactivity are definitely attractive. At the same time, the COL is a good place to just love Jesus together with everyone in the overall work. Very inspiring!
In a Nutshell
* relationship with the Lord (helping everyone develop a personal relationship with Jesus),
* relationship with other people in the group (helping everyone in the group develop healthy and loving relationships with one another),
* relationship with the lost sheep (imparting a broken heart for others and a desire to share Jesus with them).
* connect people through personal relationships,
* create a basis for the work by forming small groups headed by your Active member bellwethers,
* connect the group leaders (who are probably in your Discipleship Group) to the overall vision through the live-in shepherd,
* grow and multiply groups by reaching new people regularly.
* follow Jesus, the Good Shepherd,
* serve as under-shepherds,
* normally oversee groups of 12—or no more than 15 (even Jesus only chose to shepherd 12 closely).
* to feed the Word,
* to strengthen the weak (Prayer for Love and Mercy),
* to heal the sick,
* to bind up the injured,
* to bring back the strays and seek the lost,
* to lead gently and not harshly.
(Luke 4:18-19; John 21:15, Ezekiel 34:1-6)
* experiences group life through active and committed involvement under live-in supervision,
* completes the required leadership training program by joining a Discipleship Group (see box on page 13, Training Bellwethers in the Discipleship Group),
* helps out the leader of a current group (1 Timothy 3:10),
* works in unity with leadership by being faithful to the Lord, to your leadership, and to others.
* are the best way to achieve several goals at once, offering discipleship, fellowship, care for the weaker sheep, Word study, prayer, and a vision for witnessing;
* have a support and training system to encourage their life and growth;
* encourage each group leader to hear from the Lord himself, and follow the overall direction the Lord is leading the Family as a whole.
BOX:
In the Discipleship Group, we major on things like establishing new habits of Word time, quiet time, hearing from the Lord, memorization, and witnessing. We also emphasize the qualities of discipleship, such as yieldedness, accepting shepherding, how to shepherd and make disciples of others, knowing and understanding our basic beliefs, witnessing, overcoming the Devil, developing a winning attitude, being a servant rather than a big-shot leader, time management, teamwork, effective communications, developing the gifts of the Spirit, handling conflicts in small groups, leading a meeting, building your groups between meetings, and other leadership lessons.
In some of our small groups, we are experimenting with training our bellwethers as group leaders right from the beginning, so that they are aware of their job to make disciples of the newcomers. This is going well, as they are now mature enough to know how to handle them. Also they are much more aware of the need to be disciples themselves! It is important that we allot time for this, as these new bellwethers really need to be shepherded when they shepherd others.
The question has often arisen, Are our Active members really mature enough to give classes, shepherd new converts, and have a ministry? Good question! It all comes down to how much of a Word base they have, and how much time we have invested in them—both on a personal basis as well as in on-the-job clinical training.
One thing we have seen, though, is that the new people who join us will often go to these bellwethers-in-training for counsel before they come to us, as they figure they are just a step in front of them, while we, the Charter members, are more like three steps in front.
The contents of the open group meeting can be quite simple but should be well-balanced. We’ve found that it was best if the actual meeting didn’t exceed 90 minutes, so there would be time afterwards for fellowship, individual prayer, and personal counseling for those who would like it. However, you may find your sheep would like a longer time in the Word together, and can benefit from that. A lot depends on the age, lifestyle, and maturity in the Word of your sheep; you will have to pray and find out what works best. Our meetings have gone like this:
Here are some simple questions to ask in the Bible study portion of the meeting:
What stands out to you in this passage?
What seems to be the main point?
Can you illustrate this conclusion from an experience in your life?
What is the Lord trying to show you personally right now?
d. Prayer request time (15-20 minutes): Take time to pray for special requests, especially spiritual breakthroughs for the people in the group. Allot the time to hear from the Lord, if He so leads. For everyone’s encouragement, keep a running list of prayer requests with the date of the request, the request itself, then the date the prayer was answered.
e. Share the vision/outreach time (10-15 minutes): Witnessing is a commandment, not an option, and this is the time to talk about witnessing plans and to pray for everyone’s sheep. This emphasis on witnessing is how the group will grow. After they have relaxed (icebreaker), praised the Lord, gotten fed and applied the Word (Bible study), and turned their burdens over to the Lord (prayer requests), it’s time for everyone to think about others and how to win the lost. Now that everyone is feeling high in the Spirit, it’s time to focus on how to get others into our wonderful Fifth Dimension. Witnessing strategies (planning and delegating) and desperate prayer for specific sheep are the mainstays of this share the vision time. It is also important to discuss how to build friendships with new people or with people in our social circles.
If this part of the meeting gets forgotten or there isn’t time left for it for several weeks in a row, schedule it for the beginning of a few meetings so as not to let it slide for too long. Witnessing is the key to growth and true discipleship! Plan outreach events. Pray for your sheep. Discuss the needs of the sheep. Share the vision for multiplication.
This is just a general outline of the stages of growth of a small group, and things may or may not happen exactly this way with your groups; this projection is adapted from that of non-Family Christians working with small groups. However, we’ve found that it helps if you and those attending don’t have unrealistic expectations. This breakdown helps make it clear ahead of time that you will go through different stages in your growth together, and that unity and bearing fruit as a group don’t happen all at once.
1.Discovery: Getting to know you! This honeymoon stage is exciting. People are getting to know each other and are enjoying it.
2.Conflict and adjustment: I didn’t know he was like that! He seemed so nice in the beginning! In this conflict phase of group life, personality and value differences can create tension. People are still getting to know each other better and at this stage are often not enjoying it!
3.Community: There’s unity and a growing sense of a team in formation, with a common mission. In this phase of group life, people have worked through many of their differences and are learning to love and appreciate one another. Let’s get our eyes off of one another and on the goal! A sense of united vision moves the group forward.
4.Outreach and multiplication: Every group is different, but we have seen it is healthy to get everyone headed in the direction of growing and eventually multiplying. For the group to remain intimate and effective, you should multiply the group and the leadership whenever it has grown significantly. If you don’t, you run a great risk of the group stagnating and losing vitality.
Your group may take two years to grow enough to multiply, to break into two. Or it may take just three or four months, depending on how many strong bellwethers you have in the group and how much your group is into inviting others. But generally a good goal is for a small group of six to eight to ask the Lord to add on another six to eight members over the period of a year. This gives you a year to train an undershepherd to take over at multiplication time.
1. Be up front yourself, talking about your own trials and victories. Honesty breaks down barriers and is the best policy. Show transparency, sharing your own needs.
2. End meetings on time to allow for fellowship after the meeting.
3. Open up your Home to your sheep. Be there for them!
4. Have fun and food together as a group.
5. Include people in your everyday activities of shopping, entertainment (video night, parties, etc.), and helping one another out (help them move, paint the house, etc.).
6. Sit together with those of your group at area-wide or city-wide meetings, such as the weekly Church of Love, if you have a combined meeting of several Homes like that.
7. Teach the stages of group life to help people have realistic expectations.
8. Phone one another between meetings. Stay in close touch with your sheep.
9. Assign prayer and share partners so everyone in the group is responsible for someone.
Editor: The icebreakers provide just one part of the meeting, as Tommy is suggesting, and it is not the main part, certainly not superseding the Bible study or praise or prayer.
It has been a valuable part, though, in reaching a certain type of people—to set the stage and help people open up and relax, and to achieve the overall goal of the meeting in drawing people closer to the Lord and to you. As Dad said, To win some, you have to be winsome.—You have to consciously do things that will have the effect on people that you want them to have for the sake of their own learning and their own spiritual growth. So we’ve devoted a few pages here to ideas on icebreakers, to help people enter in to fellowship, drop the barriers that divide, help them relax, and create an atmosphere of friendship and even family.
Remember that the points in this FSM are just tips from Tommy on how they did it in their Home. It will be up to you to ask the Lord what works best on your field, with your sheep, and with your Home. This particular section on icebreakers was adapted from material by other Christian churches, but has pointers which you may find helpful.
What is an icebreaker? An icebreaker is a simple question that helps people feel comfortable in a group. It’s a good meeting opener, when everyone is in need of seeing friends and relaxing after a hard day’s work or a long week. The icebreaker helps people get out of themselves at the beginning of a meeting and think a little bit about the others in the group. (That isn’t usually their focus when they first arrive!) This helps create a good atmosphere for your weekly meeting.
Why use icebreakers? Icebreakers are important for the growth of your group. People don’t just automatically open up and tell about their lives or ask for prayer in a group. The icebreakers help people to share their hearts and feel that they won’t be hurt if they open up about some of the deep things they go through.
Look at your icebreaker time as your first step in getting ready to swim. If you don’t have a notion of how to breathe while you’re swimming, you’ll become full of fear and drown!—Small group meetings are no different. If you want your group to get deeper and enter into genuine spiritual growth and be open about the important things in life, the use of icebreakers can be a real help, even if it doesn’t seem so at first.
Icebreakers also help you learn things about the people in your group that you probably wouldn’t find out any other way. At the beginning of one meeting, the leader asked: What was your favorite toy when you were young? Many will talk about their favorite truck or Barbie doll. One woman said: I grew up in Germany in World War II and at that time no one had toys. I lived with my sister in an underground tunnel. As the group started to sympathize with her, she went on to say: I didn’t need a toy. I had my sister. Normally it would have taken months for this woman to open up in this way, but through a simple question, the group saw a whole new side of this woman.
How long should the icebreaker last? A typical icebreaker takes a minute or less for each person to answer. Some may take longer, but be careful to watch your time! You could end up taking one full hour of your meeting on the icebreakers if you allowed each person in a group of 12 just five minutes each. This is why it is good for you as the leader to start out and set the sample for the others, both in time and in content (you yourself being open and transparent).
What are different types of icebreakers? There are thousands of questions you can come up with for a group of people (much like our Talk Time booklet to stimulate parent-child communication). But only those the Lord shows you will help activate a given group on a given night. So pray and ask the Lord which ones to use! When the group is new, choose icebreakers that will help the people tell a little bit about themselves (their favorite things, hobbies, places where they grew up, what their brothers and sisters are like, etc.), as well as light icebreakers that will simply help them relax (What is your favorite store? or TV show). The main thing you want to accomplish is to make everyone feel close together and break down the walls of stress and shyness.
If you’ve already been together for a few months, you could use a more serious question like: What was the most important thing that happened to you last week?
Are there icebreakers for the different stages of the group? As mentioned before, the life span of a small group can fall into four stages: honeymoon, conflict and adjustment, the forming of a team with a common goal (to win others to the group), and multiplication. Every stage requires a different type of question.
The longer a group is together, the deeper the opening question should be. But don’t forget that the main purpose is to break the ice and not necessarily get so deep that you feel the need to stop the meeting right there and minister to someone who is really going through it, as this can easily happen. Save this time of prayer for personal needs and requests for later on in the meeting, when everyone is more fed and spiritually prepared to get down to serious prayer for those in need.
Are there tips for leading a good icebreaker? The best way to deliver the icebreaker is to ask and then answer the question yourself first, as the group leader, thus being the sample as to honesty and brevity. Then turn to the person next to you and ask him or her to share something. Most people get the point after the first two people answer the question and things just roll. Just keep the ball rolling and make it clear that other comments outside of the icebreaker can be made later, just so the icebreaker doesn’t drag on into other parts of the meeting (praise time, Word, prayer, and witnessing updates), which are equally important. This reminds those who are more long-winded that they can answer the icebreaker only once and also allows the shyer ones to share when their turn comes in the circle rather than always being last!
Leave them with option of passing, so that people don’t feel obligated to be in the spotlight if they’re just not up for it. Some people need more time to prepare or think than others. Then, after everyone has answered, you can still go back to those who passed and ask if they would like to answer now. Most will want to.
The icebreaker is one of the best parts of the meeting to delegate to a potential leader in the group. This is a pretty low-key part of the meeting to delegate. Inviting others to lead different parts of the meeting creates an atmosphere of belonging; everyone feels a part and will be encouraged about eventually leading a group of their own.
How can you deal with the unexpected during the icebreaker? What do you do when someone suddenly drops a bomb during the icebreaker? (I lost my job, My father died yesterday, My wife just left me.) Thank the person right there for sharing such intimate news, then tell him you can pray for him later on in the meeting when everyone has shared and is more prepared to pray. That way you won’t feel like you need to jump into heavy prayer without being prepared and the whole meeting (and possibly the several meetings following) won’t necessarily need to overemphasize any one person’s problems in particular unless the Lord leads.
What do you do if someone says something a bit off-color about his wife or someone else in the group during the icebreaker? This can make everyone feel a bit uncomfortable! You may want to mention to that person that maybe he or she could discuss this point with you [or with the person addressed] later, as this may not be the best moment or place to share that type of thing. Then you may want to direct yourself to the group and say something like: This group is a place where everyone needs to feel free to speak up, but at the same time without unnecessarily discussing things that could hurt others. We are here to love one another, and nothing that we say or do should keep us from loving one another.
Be sure to say it gently enough that you do not embarrass the person who made the comment, or draw unnecessary attention to what was said. Show unconditional love, as you explain these things. Then get back to where you left off in the circle without delay. If you get stuck on this type of problem, everyone starts wanting to head for the door!
Sometimes an apparently innocent question can be like sticking a finger into someone’s open wound. One time someone asked, How many brothers and sisters do you have and where did you spend your childhood? Everyone was answering in a pretty routine manner when all of a sudden a woman who had lost her sister went running for the door, crying. Even though her sister had died a whole year before that and she seemed to be okay with it, she was still suffering in her heart. We apologized, but it still took a few weeks for her to get over it.
The decision to use that question as an icebreaker that night was made off the top of our heads. Had we really prayed and sought the Lord a little more about the situation and the reality it would touch on for each of the sheep, we undoubtedly would have come up with another question.
So really pray about the questions you plan to ask. If you’re on your way to your group without having prepared your icebreaker question, ask your wife or right-hand man if he or she feels good about the question you plan to ask. They might be thinking about certain people’s feelings more than you are or even know about something that happened recently that you don’t know yet. And then be sure to stop and ask the Lord for His confirmation before the meeting starts.
Take time to train others! When you teach others how to conduct this part of the meeting (and you should!), ask them to observe how you do it and discuss it with them after the meeting. Then ask them to do it the next week. Then discuss afterwards how they could have done it better—after lavish praise, naturally! After a few times, they themselves will tell you what they could have done better or what went well. It shouldn’t be difficult for them to do the icebreaker if you have given them a good example.
What are some icebreakers to avoid? One young live-out disciple who led a group was so uptight when he was leading the meeting, the people in the group thought he might suffer a heart attack! He was super-disciplined and really loved the Lord. When he was the right-hand man, he was asked to lead the icebreaker. He asked: What happened to you this last week that made you upset? He then answered first, saying he was upset with the group leader. The rest of the group followed suit and implacably attacked the group leader.
Some icebreakers just shouldn’t be asked. They provoke people to reveal deep hurts or the sins of others, or are simply not appropriate or too personal for a given group at a given time. If you lead off a meeting with an inappropriate question (Share something that you hate about the person to your left) or one too intimate to be shared in public, the others in the group will only tell half-truths or simply pass when it comes their turn.
If in doubt, you can ask the question and then ask the group as a whole if they would like to answer it or not. If just one person has reservations, change questions. The worst thing you want to do is get your group off on the wrong foot in the first five minutes of the meeting.
It’s your turn! The most important thing is to just really pray beforehand and the Lord will show a good icebreaker that will get the meeting off to a bang! Icebreakers can provide the fellowship that everyone needs after a hard day, as well as a good laugh that can be the highlight of the whole week! Sometimes we have laughed until we almost cried!
Remember, there are usually no right or wrong answers to the questions that you ask in an icebreaker. Icebreakers are revealing and can be very humbling as well as hilarious, which helps people connect. Intimacy in a group begins with a good hug and an icebreaker!
1. What was the most important thing that happened to you last week?
2. What was the biggest blessing from the Lord last week?
3. What was the high point of your week?
4. What was the funniest thing that happened to you in the last week?
5. What was the most fulfilling job you ever had?
6. Tell about your most unusual haircut.
7. What was the best present you received as a child?
8. Who was your best childhood friend?
9. What is your favorite insect?
10. What is one fact about yourself that most people probably don’t know?
11. Complete the following phrase: People are most surprised when they find out I _____________.
12. What would you most like to do if you could get a day off this week?
13. What was the most expensive present that somebody ever gave you?
14. Who was the person who you most liked to take care of you when you were a child?
15. Do you have a scar somewhere? How did you get it?
16. What part of your house do you like best?
17. Tell the name of the vehicle that best describes you and why.
18. Describe yourself using a symbol (a piece of paper and a pen will be needed).
19. Write your name vertically in big letters and use each letter to be the first letter of a word that describes yourself in a positive manner.
20. Does your name have a special meaning? Was it given in honor of someone?
21. When was the last time you did something for the first time in your life?
22. What is your favorite piece of clothing?
23. Describe your week comparing it to a motor (for example, souped-up, in neutral, slow, at a good speed, etc.).
24. What was the highest praise you have ever received?
25. Who was your childhood hero? How did you try to imitate him or her?
26. Who was the most interesting person who ever visited you or your family?
27. What question would keep you talking on and on?
28. What is something you really like about your life currently?
29. What was the first trip you remember having been on with your family and what do you remember about this trip?
30. What was your first nickname?
31. If you could take a pill that would allow you to live 1,000 years, would you take it? Why?
32. Who is the actor or actress that you most relate to personally?
33. What is your favorite sport or hobby?
34. Tell three of your favorite activities.
35. When you get cold, where do you like to go to warm up?
36. Who is the person you most respect?
37. Describe your week with colors.
38. Did you ever wish to exchange your life with someone else? With whom?
39. What was the funniest dream you ever had?
40. What is your favorite kind of pillow (feather, thin, fluffy, heavy)?
41. What is your favorite store?
42. What is your favorite place in a bus or plane (front, back, window, aisle, the middle)?
43. When and how did you learn to drive?
44. What animal best describes your personality?
45. Have you ever had clothes that you loved to wear, but others thought were atrocious?
46. What was the longest phone conversation you ever had and with whom?
47. What ability or talent do you have that you most like?
48. What foot do you first put your shoe on?
49. Who was, in your opinion, the best detective of all time?
50. Describe the pet that you and your family liked most.
51. What is the most important thing that happened to you in the last year?
52. Do you exercise regularly? Why?
53. In what ways do you resemble your father?
54. In what ways do you resemble your mother?
55. Of the junk food you eat, what is your favorite?
56. Who is (or was) your first friend and how long have you been (or were you) friends?
57. Tell something positive about the person on your right.
58. When you were a child, how did your parents make you feel when you were sick?
59. What is your ideal vacation?
60. What is your favorite cartoon?
61. What is your favorite TV program?
62. What is your favorite book?
63. What is the best thing you can do when you realize you’re getting nervous or upset?
64. What type of music do you listen to in your car? (Good chance to do an advertisement for our tapes and CDs!)
65. What is your favorite time of the day and why?
66. Using a fruit or vegetable, describe your life this week (dry prune, smashed banana, pineapple, sweet peach, pickle, etc.)
67. Tell of three activities you most like to do with your friends.
68. What does your dream car look like?
69. Are you a collector of something? What?
70. If your house went without electricity for a week, what would you miss the most?
71. Complete the phrase: Just for fun, before I die I would like to ___________.
72. What is your favorite memory?
73. What animal best describes your mood today?
74. Tell about the first toy you ever remember.
75. What is the first means of transport that your family used? Why do you still remember it?
76. What was the best advice you ever received?
77. What is the best food you ever ate?
78. What was the worst food you ever ate?
79. What was the best trip you ever took?
80. What is the worst trip you ever took?
81. What is the craziest thing you ever spent your money on?
82. What was your most incredible adventure?
83. What was the most special thing anyone ever told you?
84. What is oldest piece of clothing you still use?
85. What job did you have that paid the least?
86. What is your favorite Christmas decoration?
87. What is your favorite kind of recreation?
88. What magazine would you most like to be featured on the cover of and what would be the headline?
89. What was the most special Christmas present you ever gave to someone?
90. What was the worst decision you ever made about something you bought?
91. Tell about the place you would like to go for your next vacation.
92. Describe your first boyfriend or girlfriend.
93. What is funniest name for a pet that you ever heard?
94. What do you call your grandparents and why?
95. What is there a lot of in your house?
96. What would you like to be doing 10 years from now?
97. When you were small, what did you want to be when you grew up?
98. What type of animal did you have as a pet when you were small? What was its name and why?
99. What weather or climate term would best describe your week?
100. What was the kitchen of your house like when you were small?
101. What was your first paid job?
102. Are you a night person or a morning person?
1. If you could say something to your boss, what would you say?
2. Describe a situation when you lied to someone or someone lied to you. How did you feel?
3. What was the worst storm or natural disaster you’ve ever seen?
4. What didn’t you like about yourself when you were a teen that you have now changed?
5. Who is the person who has had the greatest impact on your life?
6. What was the last totally selfless thing you did?
7. What was the toughest vacation you went on as a child and why?
8. What is your biggest need in the coming year? Your biggest desire?
9. What would you like to see the Lord do in your life in the coming year?
10. What verse would you like to claim for the year ahead?
11. What was your biggest personal victory of the past year?
12. What type of smell provokes the most memories for you?
13. What was the biggest mistake you ever made in your career?
14. When did you go the longest without sleep? Why?
15. When somebody tells you that you’re doing something wrong, what is your reaction?
16. Would you leave for a distant land for a person you love, even if that means little chance of ever seeing your family and other loved ones again?
17. What is your most out of control habit? How do you try to break it?
18. Where do you feel trapped in your life right now?
19. What would you like to do to change something about the way you were raised?
20. What subject—if there is one—is too serious to make jokes about?
21. What would you like to be most remembered for?
22. Which of your birthdays brings back the best memories for you? Why?
23. Whom have you tried to please recently and why?
24. Have you ever lent your best friend something and it came back broken? What did you do about it?
25. After a hard day, how do you relax?
26. If you could give a little piece of advice about anything, what would it be?
27. Tell about a situation that came up this last week that left you stressed out .How did you deal with it?
28. Tell something that you learned about yourself this last year.
29. If you could change something about your past, what would it be?
30. If you could put something inside the mind of your parents or children, what would it be?
31. What did you learn this week?
32. You discover that, due to a hospital error, your wonderful one-year-old was not yours but had been exchanged for another at birth. Would you try to correct the mistake?
33. Did you (or did you) like your school? Why? What would you have changed?
34. One of your friends is not taking good care of his or her appearance. Would you tell them?
35. Do you like to go to parties? Why?
36. How long do you stay resentful with people? How do you resolve this?
37. Were you closer to your father or your mother? Why?
38. Do you express your feelings verbally? Why?
39. What do you do with presents you don’t like?
40. When was the last time you told someone I love you? Is it easy for you to say I love you?
41. Do you still ask for help from your parents when you have problems?
42. Do you feel uncomfortable eating out or going to a movie alone? How about going on vacation by yourself?
43. Do you normally do what you like to do, or do you do what others would like you to do?
44. When was the last time you were caught in a lie? What happened?
45. How do you feel about older folks? What does the word elderly mean to you?
46. How do you think other people would describe you?
47. Talk about a trick you use to get out of something you don’t like to do.
48. How much do you laugh in a week?
49. If someone killed a member of your family, would you forgive him or her?
50. What would you do if you discovered that your best friend was a closet homosexual?
51. If you asked your family what it is that you most complain about, what would they say? Why do you complain about this?
52. Would you give 75% of all that you have if a pill was discovered that would let you get enough sleep or rest in just one hour a day? Why?
53. Would you like to be rich? Why?
54. What in your life are you the most thankful for?
55. Where do you go and what do you do when you are the most stressed out?
56. How do you react when someone praises you?
57. What do you like most about your life? What do you like the least?
58. Did you ever steal something? When was the last time?
59. What would be harder for you: to be deaf or be blind?
60. What is your greatest joy? Pain? Challenge?
61. When was the last time you cried in front of somebody? Alone?
62. What was the most difficult thing you ever had to say to someone?
63. How does vacation go with your family?
64. What do you most respect in your parents?
65. When you disagree with someone, do you isolate yourself or do you confront him or her?
66. Using a football game as a comparison with your life, where are you right now: in the parking lot, in the bleachers, on the field?
67. Share about the most important day of your life.
68. If your family and friends were able to say what they really thought about you, would you let them? Why?
1. Who would you most like to see receive Jesus into their heart this week?
2. How would you describe the gifts of the Spirit to a person who does not believe in them?
3. How do you deal with a bad situation?
4. When was the last time you felt happy serving somebody else?
5. Where were you when you prayed for the first time? What atmosphere most helped or hindered your prayer?
6. What is the best thing about your group?
7. What do you like the most about the Family?
8. What do you like most about your shepherd?
9. How often do you have Word time?
10. Do you tell others about your past sins? Why?
11. How has the Lord used you recently?
12. What was the most important thing you ever did for somebody?
13. Did you ever share a major battle you were going through with a friend? How did you feel?
14. If you could ask Noah a question, what would it be?
15. What was a message the Lord had for you this week?
16. In what specific way do you feel you grew spiritually in the last month?
17. If the Lord showed you to specifically pray for one person this month, how would you pray?
18. Which rich and famous person would you like to see get saved?
19. If you were to die today, would you be okay with God?
20. How do you feel about tithing?
21. What does the word hate mean to you?
22. What is your spiritual temperature today (in degrees Fahrenheit or Celsius)? Why?
23. Tell about something you learned about the Lord this last year.
24. What part of your personality is the Lord changing presently?
25. If you could ask the Lord to change one thing in the world today, what would it be?
26. What are you trusting the Lord for presently, something that only God can do?
27. What is your vision of Heaven?
(Editor: When the group has grown, you may feel the Lord leading you to form two groups in order to keep them small, more personal, and easier to manage. This may mean that some will not be meeting in the same group with those they have grown close to. On the other hand, it means making room for more newcomers, which is after all the purpose of outreach—to bring the Lord to more people and then draw them in so they can also begin to learn more about Him, His Word, His love, His ways, and all the benefits He can bring as we draw close to Him. Discussing this change can help.
After having developed such good friendships, people are often quite sad to think their group will be breaking up, so harvest time isn’t always a cause for rejoicing. However, there are several ways to help people over the hump, and often the best way is to share testimonies as to how the Lord always blessed your changes and moves that will result in greater usefulness. Life for the Lord is full of forsaking, but it is worth it, so that others may benefit. Like they say, The only way to keep love is to give it away.
See also the section below on ways to multiply your group. It may be possible for some people to stay together in Discipleship Groups as post-grads, or for a few people to launch out to start a new group, if they feel the Lord wants them to continue to work together.)
1. How do you feel about multiplying into two or more groups?
2. What did you learn about during your group’s time together?
3. What did the Lord do in your life through someone in your group?
4. What was the most difficult thing you learned during this cycle of your group?
5. In one word, what is it like when your group is together?
6. Is there anything that scares you about multiplication? What?
7. What makes you happy about multiplying?
8. Have you already been through a group multiplication? What is the same or different this time?
9. What was the most difficult time for your group?
10. What was the easiest time for your group?
11. What will you do differently in your next group?
12. What did you learn from one of the members recently?
13. What in the life of your group shepherd had the most impact on you?
14. What about serving others most changed your life during the life of this group?
15. Tell the moment in the life of your group that had the greatest impact on your life.
16. What have you learned about witnessing to the lost in this group?
17. What prayers of yours were answered in the time the group has been together?
18. Did you bring a visitor at some point to the group? Who would you like to invite to the next meeting?
19. How much time did it take for the group to multiply? Are you happy with this? Could you have done something differently?
1. Many people have the wrong idea of witnessing. They feel nervous or guilty when they hear the word witnessing, since they haven’t done much—at least not in a way they consider successful. Yet almost everyone feels good about the way they were witnessed to!
2. The best witnessers are ordinary people!
3. Outgoing love is the best way to show someone the Lord’s love—love in action!
4. Effective witnessing takes time!
5. Lots of people are usually involved in leading someone to the Lord, not just one!
6. In 80% of cases, the person is led to the Lord by a friend or relative.
1. Pray! (Matthew 9:38)
2. See everyone as a potential future leader! (Ask the Lord to help you see the potential in others!)
3. Constantly involve others in the Activated meetings and other ministry opportunities.
4. Give people responsibilities BEFORE you ask them to be leaders!
5. Consult with your teamworkers and/or your Home shepherds before conferring any titles or positions.
6. Pray and plan with your trainees.
7. Ask questions before you give correction. For example, when you go over a meeting with a leader in training (James 1:19), you could say something like, What did you think about the meeting? What would you do differently?
8. Encourage! New leaders in training need more encouragement than correction. Apply the nine to one rule: nine times more encouragement than correction.
9. Give your group away to your understudy, giving him more responsibility gradually.
10. Groups can give birth in three ways:
* Multiply – Two groups of equal size multiply from the parent group. For example, when the group reaches 12, it breaks up into two groups of six each, with the right-hand man (or woman, of course) becoming the shepherd of the new group, as Dad led us to do during the New Revolution in the ‘70s.
* Launch – A core group of two or three strongest members from the parent group form a teamwork to pioneer a new group.
* Ask someone to start a group of his own.—One person from a parent group plants a new group and often remains a part of the parent group.
11. Multiplication steps:
* State the vision from the beginning. This helps everyone focus and expect miracles.
* Develop leadership. Here’s how to spot a potential leader: He or she is usually teachable and has a heart for people. He or she already cares about people.
* Prepare people for coming multiplication. See suggested icebreakers for this stage, page 24 in this FSM.
* Send them out or go yourself!
If you want to go somewhere with your groups, it helps to know where you are going.
1. Good plans begin by loving the Lord above all and committing your works to Him.
2. Ask Him to reveal the priorities for your small group(s).
3. To keep the struggle for daily survival from taking over, pray to stay faithful to the plan and priorities He’s shown you.
4. Small groups grow when they focus on the Lord’s priorities, not emergencies. By following the Lord’s plan you’ll in fact be avoiding later disasters. As Dad said, I’d rather build a fence at the edge of the cliff than put a hospital at the bottom.
5. When you hear God’s yes leading in a certain direction, be prepared to say no to others when need be or when the Lord leads, to keep pressures on time and resources to a minimum. This is standard strategy for keeping stress down. Learn to delegate! You can’t do everything—so ask the Lord what you can do for Him, and what your limits are, so you don’t fail to hit the mark due to being pulled in too many directions.
Harvest events are any type of get-together—anything from a birthday party for the sun sign of the month to a meaningful meeting or a Christmas benefit dinner—that you invite newcomers to. The idea is that it is planned with a clear knowledge that you will be inviting new people, not just the same veterans or Family members, and you will use the event to reap the harvest.
At our Christmas Benefit back in 1995 we had a wonderful evening with nearly 200 people in attendance. Afterwards our Active members at the time said, This is great, but where are all those people now? Since we didn’t have a clear strategy as to how to reap the harvest that night and consolidate our gains, they wondered what our real goal was with the benefit. If ours were any other business, they certainly wouldn’t have let 200 potential customers walk out the door without ever feeling the hook. The Active members felt like, Now that you’ve got us all together, you mean to say you’re just going to let us all walk out without asking us to ‘buy’ anything? If you don’t change direction soon, you’re going to go broke!
We learned a lot about not being so low-key in our sales pitch, and now we usually have a short, sweet altar call to receive Jesus at the end of most harvest events (another word to describe these might be meaningful meeting). Then we also have an invitation to join a local Bible study, inner healing group, CTP project, sign up for Activated, etc. In other words, when you invite people to a harvest event, you’ll be exposing them not only to a nice night of fellowship and maybe even a delicious dinner, but also to an atmosphere of witnessing, with clear challenges as to how they can become more involved and committed to the Lord and the work we are doing for Him.
When we decide that a certain get-together will be a harvest event, we are then all geared toward working during it—to welcome newcomers, get them to come to the next event, get them to sign up for Activated, see if they are interested in coming to one of the group meetings, or whatever we have to offer them.
As time passes and the Lord sends more and more people, nearly everything can become a harvest event, even your Home’s Saturday night video! The sheep become more and more a part of your life and they are always asking you, Can I bring a friend of mine over to the get-together? So no matter what the get-together is, if you plan on having new sheep over, we have learned that it is best to give it a work night connotation. That way we are on duty to minister, or at least have the house clean, keep commotion in the Home at a minimum, etc.
At the same time, we don’t want to let our lives become totally run by the whims of the sheep and we need to preserve sanity and order on the Home front. So we try to schedule our harvest events for certain times, so the Home doesn’t feel like, Oh no! Everything is a harvest event! Is there anything that isn’t a harvest event? Is there any activity where I can just relax? With concrete plans, the Home members know what is and what isn’t a harvest event, and we know whether we can just relax and have some intimacy—just us! Ha! We need it!
When we do our yearly or half-yearly planning, we try to organize at least one large harvest event involving other Homes and at least one semi-production per month. Then we and our sheep know how things will be going, what events we can invite people to, etc. We often work together in a city, area, or even country on these events. Our national retreat (such as the one that King Peter and others of his Home recently visited, which you can read about in FSM 374) has evolved into nothing short of a mega-harvest event, rather than being our main leadership-training event, as the national retreat was the first three years we held it. At that time most who attended were veteran Active members and needed the training more than a place to bring new sheep. However, as time passed, the need became greater to reap the harvest. The Lord has in recent years led us to completely open the door for new people at this national retreat, to the point that now it is our major harvest event of the year.
Once something is labeled a harvest event, it then becomes very important to have a strategy as to how to minister to the sheep once they become attracted to your fold, once they want to return. This requires prayer and other events on the calendar that will make your investment in the harvest event worth it.
There are actually all kinds of harvest events—mega, medium-sized and intimate—each with a specific goal and requiring different levels of staff, resources, preparation, etc. The best way to plan harvest events is to take a look at your calendar and put them in between training sessions and retreats, so you continually have something else to invite people to. When the iron’s hot at our harvest events, it’s wise to have a variety of follow-up ideas to launch! Take full advantage of the net being spread and everyone being inspired and under the Lord’s captivating influence, to invite them to something else.
And speaking of invitations, we often use invitation quotas for the harvest events, meaning that our regulars each have a quota of a certain number of newcomers to invite. Come and see is the idea here.—Everyone participates in each harvest event by inviting lots of people to come. There is nothing new about this strategy: Jesus Himself used it and so do we! It works. And if you can help your sheep and Active members organize lists of their friends who need the Lord and whom they can invite to harvest events, then the events become more and more worthwhile.
Science has discovered that in a typical week, most people on the average see or interact with eight to ten people for an hour or more. Marketeers and pyramid schemes base their strategies on this reality. They use all their satisfied customers to sell their products to their social circle of eight to ten, who then are encouraged to sell to their social circle of eight to ten, and so the number of people reached grows.
Science has also discovered that of the eight to ten that people see and interact with each week, two of these friends or relatives will accept an invitation—almost regardless of its nature—if it is made by a friend. If we can get our main disciples to each invite eight to ten people to the next harvest event, then we know that at least two to six will actually come (depending on location of the event and about a million other factors).
To translate that into concrete results, if we give each of our 12 salesmen these quotas (actually more like goals), then we can guarantee that nearly 50 new or semi-new people will actually attend the event!—And it will then be considered a success! This will encourage everyone and stimulate them to participate the next time.
We’ve found that you need at least a month or six weeks before a large event for everyone to reach their invitation quotas. As we all know, most people are very busy and schedule their nights out well ahead of time. To be better prepared for the incoming harvest, it’s best to organize these harvest events well in advance, even if you start small. (That’s where we all start, by the way!)
Outline for a 12- (or 24-) Week Basic Course
Based on the Activated Magazines 1-12
Dear Family,
On the Members Only site is the course 12 Foundation Stones that you can use for teaching your sheep the Word and bringing them along in the Lord. However, some of you do not have access to the site, or you may be teaching in Spanish or Portuguese or some language that the 12 Foundation Stones is not translated into yet. So if you need it, here’s a course of study taken from the first 12 Activated magazines, which are translated into Spanish and Portuguese, and being translated into more languages. You could use this if you feel led, when getting together with your sheep or friends on a weekly or bi-weekly basis. The Activated Training Course will continue to have classes posted on the MO site, and will be printed and translated when complete, along with the supplementary materials. In the meantime, this is a class outline that has been used in Brazil which we pray will be a help to you as you begin gathering your friends to share prayer, love, Jesus, the Word, and fellowship on a regular basis.
Week/IssueArticle subjectCorresponding articleHomework
Subject: Salvation
Goals for the Week:
Receive Jesus!
Start reading the Gospel of John!
* Who Is Jesus?
* How to Receive Jesus
* Endtime
* Communication
* Discipleship
* Faith/God/Prayer
The Man of Love (pg.3)
(See Meet the Man! on pg.6.)
The Future Foretold, Pt.1 (pg.10)
Answers to Your Questions: Open Up! (pg.5)
Mountain Men (pg.12)
Hey, Wait a Minute! (Based on Sex Works!) (pg.14)
Read: John 1-3
Feeding Reading:
The Gospel of John
Suggestion: Read the entire book of John over the 12- week period.
Memorize: John 1:12
* The Holy Spirit/ How to Receive the H.S.
* Witnessing/ Discipleship
* Endtime
* Communications
Read: John 14-16 (on the Holy Spirit)
Feeding Reading:
The Holy Spirit
Memorize: Acts 1:8
Subject:
The Word
New Discipleship Habit of the Week: Daily Word Time!
* Prayer Tips
* What Is the Bible?
* Prophecies of Jesus
* Time management
* Endtime
* Habit of the Week
What Is Prayer? (pg.3)
Your Personal Guide (pg.4)
Proof at Last – Prophecy Fulfilled (pg.9)
Answers to Your Questions: Redeem the Time (pg.12)
The Future Foretold, Pt.3 (pg.14)
Your New Life of Love – Daily Word Time (pg.6):
1. One chapter from the Gospels (start with John)
2. One Psalm a day
3. Half a chapter from Proverbs a day
4. One page from the Daily Might, From Jesus with Love, or a section from Discovering Truth.
Read:
Psalm 119 (on the Word)
Feeding Reading:
Parables of Jesus
Memorize:
Hebrews 4:12
The 4 Tips on Prayer (pg.3)
Subject: Prayer
New Discipleship Habit of the Week: Daily Prayer Time!
* Prayer/the Promises
* The Power of Prayer
* Loneliness
* Endtime
* Habit of the Week
Streams that Never Run Dry (pg.4)
Thought Power (pg.8)
Hotline to Heaven (pg.13)
Answers to Your Questions: Loneliness (pg.12)
The Future Foretold, Pt.4 (pg.10)
Your New Life of Love (pg.14) Daily Prayer (for friends, situations, sheep, your own life, etc.)
(For more on prayer, read book Prayer Power.)
Read: (From Feeding Reading, pg. 15)
Psalms 1, 8, 19, 23, 27, 34, 37, 51, 91, 100, 121 (Suggest reading 2 a day!)
Memorize:
Mark 11:24
Subject: Witnessing
New Discipleship Habit of the Week: Witness and win souls!
* Witnessing
* Spiritual Warfare
* Marriage Tips
* Endtime
* Habit of the Week
Change the World (pg.4)
The War of the Worlds (pg.8)
Answers to Your Questions: Putting the magic back into marriage! (pg.10)
The Future Foretold, Pt.5 (pg.14)
Your New Life of Love (Witnessing, pg.7) and Wonder Working Witnessing (pg.13)
Read: John 4 to 6 (including the story of Jesus and the Samaritan woman)
Feeding Reading:
The Book of Acts
Memorize:
Mark 16:15
Subject: Endtime
New Discipleship Habit of the Week: Take Daily Quiet Time
* Endtime
* Endtime
* God’s Ways vs. Man’s Ways
* God’s Protection
* Discipleship
* Anger/Bad Temper
* Relationship with the LordThe Lion, the Dragon and the Beast (pg.4)
Knowing the Future: Should we? Can we? (pg.9)
Did God Make a Mistake? (pg.10)
A Voice in the Night (pg.15)
Never a Sacrifice (pg.3)
Answers to Your Questions: Anger (pg.12)
Your New Life of Love: Quiet Time (pg.8) (Spend 10-15 minutes a day alone with the Lord.)Read:
John 7-9;
Matthew 24-25
Feeding Reading:
Our Best Protection
Memorize:
John 15:7
Subject:
Heaven and the Spirit World
* Heaven /Life after Death
* The Price of a New Life/Your New Family
* Endtime
* The Spirit World
The Incredible Journey (pg.4)
Heaven and Its Pleasures (pg.8)
Answers to Your Questions: What am I doing wrong ? (pg.7)
The Future Foretold, Pt. 7: The Beast Is Yet to Come (pg.10)
Flatlanders (pg.12)
Read:
John 10-12
Feeding reading:
The World of the Spirit (Excellent for small group studies and COL message)
Memorize:
2 Corinthians 10:4-5
Subject:
Giving to God
* Love
* Give to God’s Work
* Giving
* Endtime
* Conflict Resolution
* Yieldedness/ Discipleship
* God’s ProtectionDeclaration of Love! (pg.4)
Giving to God (pg.6)
Gain by Giving (pg.8)
The Mark of the Beast (pg.10)
Answers to Your Questions: How can I avoid friction at work? (pg.12)
Bamboo (pg.13)
Saved from Death by God Himself (pg.3)
Read:
John 13-15
Feeding Reading:
God’s Miraculous Supply
Memorize:
Luke 6:38
Psalm 23:1
Subject:
Grace vs. Works
* Grace vs. works/ Dependency on God
* Humility/Pride
* Dependency on God
* Humility/Pride
* Time Management
* Endtime
* God’s Protection
Flesh or Spirit? (pg.4)
Humility vs. Pious Perfection (pg.7)
Whose Strength? (pg.8)
The Sultan and Satan (pg.10)
Answers to Your Questions: I Don’t Have Time: Myth or Reality? (pg.12)
Future Foretold: The Second Coming of Jesus (pg.14)
Terror on the Highway (pg.3)
Read:
John 16 to 18
Feeding Reading:
Strength from God
Memorize:
2 Corinthians 10:9-10
Subject:
Trials and Tests
Discipleship Habit of the Week:
Memorization
* Trials and Tests
* Discipleship
* Bitterness and Forgiveness
* Endtime
* Habit of the Week
Stepping Stones (pg.4)
Fighters (pg.8)
Answers to Your Questions: Remorse over the Past (pg.14)
Heavenly Victory in the Great Tribulation (pg.6)
Memorization Tips – Transform Your Mind (pg.12)Read:
John 19 to 21
Feeding reading:
Why Does God Allow Trials and Tests?
Memorize:
Psalm 119:67,71
(For further memory verses, see list on pg.13)
Subject: Hearing from the Lord
* Hearing from God / Prophecy
* Power of Prayer
* Family Relationships
* Discipleship
* Endtime
* Hearing from God
* DeliveranceGod Still Speaks (pg.3)
How Prophecy Works (pg.4)
Heaven’s Hotline (pg.7)
Answers to Your Questions (pg.6)
Dare to Be Different (pg.8)
The King’s Return (pg.12)
Turn On and Tune In (pg.11)
Delivered! (pg.14)Read:
1 John 1-3
Feeding Reading:
Hearing from God
Memorize:
Jeremiah 33:3
Subject: Healing
* Faith
* Miracles and healing
* Endtime: Millennium
* Healing Testimonies
* Faith for Healing
* Verses to Claim for HealingFaith, the Title Deed (pg.3)
The Day of Miracles Is Not Past! (pg.4)
Tomorrow’s Wonderful World (pg.8)
Healing: A Touch of Heaven (pg.10)
Feet of Faith (pg.12)
Answers to Your Questions: How do I get faith for healing? (pg.15)Read:
1 John 4-5
Feeding Reading:
Examples of Jesus’ Power to Heal
Memorize:
Psalm 34:19
(End of File)